Helping Women and Children break the cycle of domestic violence...

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

24-HR HOTLINE
1800 656 463

If you need an interpreter call TTY
1800 671 442

If anyone is in physical danger or about to be harmed, call the POLICE on 000 immediately!

Leaving Home

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE 24-HR HOTLINE

1800 656 463
If you need an interpreter call TTY
1800 671 442

If anyone's in physical danger or about to be harmed, call the POLICE on 000 immediately!

How do you handle her abusive partner?

 

Be careful. Don’t place yourself in a position where the person who is being abusive could harm or manipulate you. Don’t try to intervene directly if you witness a person being assaulted – call the police instead. If the person who is being abusive is your friend or relative, you may feel caught in the middle. If the woman has confided in you about abuse, you need her permission to speak to her partner. He could blame her for telling someone else and the abuse could get worse.

If you do talk to the abusive partner you might hear a whole bunch of excuses.  They might:

  •  
  • tell you to ‘mind your own business’
  • deny the abuse
  • say ‘how can you think I could do something like that?’
  • make it seem like it’s ‘not that bad’
  • that it only happened once
  • make it seem like it’s the other person’s fault
  • that it’s her behaviour that’s the problem, not theirs
  • say that they couldn’t help themselves, they were drunk, just ‘snapped’, or ‘lost control’.
    • None of these responses mean that he is not abusive.  Abusers commonly use excuses, blame the other party or minimise the abuse. It is possible that the person who is abusive may admit the abuse was their fault, but say they don’t know how to stop their behaviour.

      Men who abuse women can contact

      Mensline
      Support, Information and Referral
      http://www.menslineaus.org.au
      24/7 Hotline: 1300 78 99 78

      The National Help, Counselling & Referral Service for Perpetrators and Victims of Violence in Relationships.  http://www.lifeline.org.au/find_help/other_helplines/domestic_violence__and__sexual_assault_helpline
      24 hour Hotline 1800 200 526

      CCDVCAS would like to thank the Domestic Violence Resource Centre Victoria for their wonderful work with domestic violence. The information above was inspired and adapted from http://www.dvrcv.org.au/help-advice/guide-for-families-friends-and-neighbours/.